Today is a Day of Pretend

I typed this this morning before my piano lesson arrived and emailed it to a friend. She thought it would make for a great, if not very transparent, blog post. So, at the risk of being transparent about my less than stellar mood today, here it is:

Today is a day of pretend.

I am going to pretend that I got 8 blissful hours of sleep last night, and have woken up rejuvenated and refreshed and not think about the mere 3 hours that I really got.

I am going to pretend that I do not have heartburn from too much water or leg cramps left over from said night of sleep, and instead pretend that I ate a delicious meal of shrimp scampi and breadsticks covered in marinara sauce from Olive Garden last night, and that my legs are tired from the marathon that I won yesterday. 

I am going to pretend that my child did not wake me twice last night screaming at the top of his lungs for no apparent reason other than perhaps he too had heartburn, or that they were not in fact night terrors, but instead he just loves me so much that he wanted additional cuddle time in the wee hours of the night.

I am going to pretend that my house is sparkling clean, the dishes all put away, the counters all wiped down, a meal already prepared for the night is tucked safely away in the fridge, right next to the mocha chocolate chip cheesecake for dessert. Towels are clean, clothes are washed, folded, and neatly organized in all drawers and closets, so that I can rest peacefully this afternoon in a blissful nap knowing that my wifely chores are already taken care of for the day.

I am going to pretend that I do not have nausea from forgetting medicine last night, but that I am just having hungry pangs for the above mentioned cheesecake for later today.

I am going to pretend that my child will be a perfect little angel and play nicely by himself all day. He will not have any poopy diapers or tantrum throwing moments, and he will constantly say, "Please," and "Thank you," and "I love you Mommy, you're the bestest" in his own little way.

I am going to pretend that the maintenance crew on the other side of my Venetian blinds are not tearing out and replacing water rotted siding and old gutters, but that instead they are building a beautiful wrap around porch with  white railing, white wicker furniture with bright Martha Stewartesque patio cushions and an oak porch swing, which I will sit on this evening as I watch the fire flies and feel the beautiful and humid-less breeze as I swing and sip my limeade, which will also not give me heartburn ;).   

I am going to pretend that my attitude today is one of a chipper disposition, bordering on a Southern Belle charm....

....ah crud, I'm out of creamer, running late for lessons now, and those darn power tools just starting rearing outside my door...!!!!